DOING MOTHERING IN NON-MONOGAMOUS RELATIONSHIPS. STRATEGIES AND PRACTICES OF WOMEN IN POLAND

This paper examines the topic of mothering within consensually non-monogamous relationships (CNM) and families in contemporary Poland, which is often perceived as a conservative, Catholic country. It discusses the emotional and practical challenges, such as time management and social perception, and dealing with emotions. The empirical data derives from fieldwork on women’s strategies and practices for living in non-monogamous relationships in Poland, conducted since October 2019 to the present day. The author uses the method of multi-sited ethnography, which allows her to explore the uniqueness of the individual dimension of the phenomenon and root the narratives of research partners in the social and cultural contexts and discourses that shape them. In Poland public and political debates about maternity and family planning consistently lead to disputes about the nature of family, gender roles, and, ultimately, Polishness. Women, as biologically predisposed to bear children, automatically play the role of reproducers of the nation, as well as carriers of national traditions and values. I argue that despite the hegemonic conservative discourse on family, sexuality and reproduction in contemporary Poland the sphere of practices that accompany women in CNM’s relationships reveal different approaches and understandings of motherhood and family and show their agency and resistance in alternative mothering strategies. This article contributes to expanding the state of research on new family forms and practices while accounting for gender, class, and sexuality. It also shows changes in family practices in the Polish context. The paper aims to answer the following questions: How do women in CNM plan and practice motherhood? What are their definitions of motherhood and family? What do maternal care and responsibility look like? How do women deal with the mono-normative and heteronormative stigma?